working is a tiring. this week has just been hell. work was rather sianning. i mean, its really boring work but guess, can't epect so much with just an o level cert on hand at the moment. had to rush for UTC on friday.. din sleep the whole camp. its just annoyig that the cadets were more tired than the CIs when they actually had at least had some sleep!! this girls are extremely weak. like those typical st.marg's girls who fucking pissed me off in the past. they better toughen up or they'll all get killed durig atc. well, that wouldn't be too much of a bad thing i suppose. after that, instead of sleeping, i watched that liverpool sheffield match. damn waste time, with the dubious sheffield defenders who posed absolutely no challenge. then, today i had to rush for tuition.. kinda screwed some parts of it.. especially when they started asking me abt teh light chanpter. i mean, the last time that i ever learnt that was like in sec school!! but, being the genius that i am*ahems, somehow managed the situation. and the, tmr, its back to work.. everything's so mundane.

i need something more in my life!!!

will be starting work from tomorrow. yay, $$$!!!!

coming soon : praveena and her hot body

lol.=P

this is like the worst vday ever. i have absolutely no one for company. haha, but funnily, i'm not exactly sad. indulged in some sinful food while trying to shrug off the few couples holding hands, acting all mushy. somehow, i think there are too few couples out on vdae. evidence on how overrated it has become. and how happy i get when i see a hot guy looking like he doesn't have vdae plans!!=) was talking to piggy and we were saying how we would probably celebrate our 20th anniversary of being dateless on vdae together next yr. oh, how i hope that doesn't happen.

so, praveena naidu, stop being all obnoxious and egoistic around guys you like and try acting a little humble, shy and feminine. or it'll really be another dateless vday next yr.

i guess i only have the gym of company on V-day!




darn.

oh, anyway, got a job at lta. wif my dear babe's help! =)

was feeling like i couldn't be any more broken. still lil bit miserable. but i guess, i cannot do anything if its not supposed to be so.

i fucking hate myself for this!

went to gym today. second time in a week. so, hopefully i'll make it a routine. thankfully, even after months of not having any exercise, still managed to pretty much do everything decently well.. hah, best part was i outbeat this guy in the abdominals part. fuck, should have seen the look on his face when he saw me adding more weights. hah, i was gleeing in my mind.

seems som guys are really chauvinistic pigs!! can't bear to see a girl doing better, especially when it concerns strength. at one point when i was doing the cycling machine and this guy was doing in beside me. i just happened to be peddling faster than him and he kept looking at my side to see how fast i was going and was keep on trying to exceed my rpm. like what the hell is his fucking problem!!! he was wearing army shirt somemore! makes you think how immature these guys can be. urrghhh!!

np's been on pretty much a lot nowadays. i'm still wondering what i'm doing. dun mind going for parade but for every damn training? its really annoying cuz the cadets aren't really bothering to learn and nobody really seems to care besides the CIs. this is not the way a unit should be running. my frens are telling me to just get a life. hah, wat an irony when i think i probably have more life than many np ppl. but, guess i have to stay. at least for my unit, i have to.

paprade today.. was so disappointed.. i really dunno what else i have to do to get the sec 3s to find the spark. sigh. feels like just giving up but lookin at the state of the unit, i dun think i should. took the sec 1s for lectures and learnt a lesson myself. seems batches are getting smarter and smarter and suddenly it comes to the extent that they mock you throughout the whole lesson. words din work with them. thought of just punishing them to get them to the serious mode, but felt it wouldn't be of any help especially in the first parade. this is so unlike the past where as a sec 1, I was so scared to even look straight at the NCOs. haiz. i guess things change and probably I have to learn to adapt to it. next time, I'm going to start talking to them in the same manner as them, adding abit more wit to it. =P

on a happier note, got my pay today. had to go all the way to kembangan to get it. haiz, then having to hear another round of advices. how i need to decide what i want to do in life, how i want to balance my personal life and career, how i must not try to do a million things, how i must not be so lazy.. and one solution: find myself a boyfren. and i said that its hard to find guys who meet my expectations. ha..yeah rite. but, in a way, sorta got me thinking. sacrifice my personal life for my career or wat. well, i've been pondering over it for ages now and am yet to find an answer. i'm such a confused girl.

so, i better go get another job soon. hopefully can get one soon. hmm..